God is Big

Disclaimer: Writing on a blog is very intimidating. There are people in this world who are incredibly witty and articulate in their writing (Noel - I secretly hate you!), but alas, I am not one of them. So, if I am honest, posting on the blog is a bit nerve racking. However, I am sitting at my computer, so completely blown away by God, that I had to write something.

God is Big.

I know this is not a complex sentence or even a new idea - but it's the best set of words I can find to explain my feelings about God tonight. 18 months ago, I sat at the Medical Teams International auction and God gently told me, "You need to go on a trip." After 6 months of ignoring that subtle nudge, I signed up and in December 2007 I went to Mexico. It was incredible...I was invited back this year, but this time, I felt God tell me - "Now it's time for you to lead."

In 25 days, a team of people from EastLake will be traveling to Honduras to build 36 latrines in 5 days...and even as I write this sentence I am tempted to ask God if He's sure He meant me to lead this team. :) Then, I have days like today....where I am completely humbled and reminded that God is BIG and everything good about this trip (and my life) is coming directly from Him.

Here's a sample of how God is providing for the team (And literally, all of this happened today!!)

• A new member signed up to go on the trip...a 17 year old kid who is pumped to go and serve with a team of people up to twice his age.
  
• The new team member is filling the spots of two people who had to cancel their trip due to injury - which means we can still build the original number of latrines we were planning
  
• A member of EastLake approached me and literally planned in one day a fundraiser for the trip that will raise between $4,000 - $5,000
• I personally received three individual notes of support and encouragement for the trip

Pretty cool, uh?

I don't understand why I can experience God so clearly working in the planning and preparation for this trip and in the same day, I can grieve with friends who feel that God is totally absent. I honestly don't think I will understand, this side of eternity, why God can feel so present and so absent at the same time...but I know that regardless of how I am feeling, God is present, He is working and He loves us so much.

I believe God is my heavenly Father and I'm His kid...and as any parent will tell you - kids think their primary job is to ask for candy and the parents job is to decide when and how much candy is good for their kids. Well, I'm asking God for a lot of candy and right now and I feel like He's giving me so much that I might get a permanent sweet tooth...but that's not going to stop me from asking!

You are invited to join in asking God for more "candy". I'm praying for: safety for the team, for wisdom for me as the team leader, for the people in rural communities in Honduras who will be using the latrines.

If you are still reading this....Thanks.

Thank you for caring enough about this trip, the team and me to spend a few minutes reading this note.
-Jenn